Queen of the Two Furrow

Here's the story:
Once upon a time, there was a regular old ranch wife with ordinary brown hair, mom jeans and second-hand wardrobe, living in a trailer house on the Two Furrow Road of Cohagen, Montana.  She had the same hamburger in her deep freeze, the same Walmart tupperware in her cupboards and same black Muck boots as every other woman on the Two Furrow.  She was rich in friends (obscenely weathly, if you want to know the truth), blessed with family she was both born into and chose, and lacked for nothing at all.
There was, however, another who was utterly and ridiculously jealous of the ranch wife; so much so that it was humorous to all who beheld it.  One of the other residents of the land jokingly teased the ranch wife about being "The Queen of the Two Furrow" and she embraced the idea.  After all, isn't it better to laugh than to fume?

And so the Queen came to be.  She was destined to be queen, as all her friends knew, because she already had a tiara on the tea pot above her royal sink!  How handy was THAT?  She had a cattle sorting stick that made a dandy scepter, a Trailblazer carriage, and a silk scarf for her cloak.  Everyone knew where the Queen of the Two Furrow lived because of the pink flamingos at the royal mail box...no one else dared put something so tacky, so out of place along the road for all the world to see!  The Queen wore scarlet heels to make coffee, earrings to work cows and cheap sunglasses. (Because, it must be said here; the Queen was as absent minded as she was eccentric, so any shades that cost more than $10 were pointless.  And temporary.)

It's early in her queenhood, but a few things have already been established:

• All women in the land should own at least one pair of mom-jeans.  There's a Mom Jean day, you know, that's celebrated in Cohagen on April 1st!  
• Her motto, which shall be on a banner, forthwith, is: Peace, Love and Cows.  Learn it, LIVE IT!
• Pie is legal for breakfast.  Encouraged, in fact.
• Cauliflower is to be banished. *shudder*
• Royal wave is a "guns up", which the Queen shall offer to the public but they're not required to respond in kind.  :)
• Cowboy boots are cool...even with yoga pants, old cut off corduroy pants, skirts...everything.

And so the tale goes...

Check back with the Chronicles for royal events and news! 

Peace, Love and Cows