Melange

Melange (pronounced m-lazh) is a French word that basically means "all sorts of different things altogether".  Sort of like a junk drawer of ideas when you find it at the Chronicles....lots of little thoughts that can't stand alone as a post, but that I want to share with you.

First, the depressing news about my garden. (Let's just get the bad stuff over with, shall we?)
We have had grasshoppers in plague levels. 

Here's my little tomato/flower/cucumber planters in a "before" picture:

Plant lovers, cover your eyes....it's brutal....

And "after":

 Same bed, one week later....those WERE marigolds in front, remember?

Enough about the hoppers.

On to another depressing topic...

:)

I turn forty this year.

There, I said it.

Whew!

And I had tossed around the idea of running a K race...any K; 5K, 10K, 1K.  It just seemed so...I don't know....standard and typical of someone turning forty.  We can't have that, now, can we?

Anyway, I get this magazine called Runner's World, which is full of people who take their running VERY seriously.  So seriously, in fact, that I can't believe I didn't have to have an interview and an approval before subscribing.  Really.

Yesterday, I was looking through all the races that are being held around the nation and overseas, and found THE race for me.  It's a half-marathon, which is incredibly intimidating (the "m" word...) and I'd have to be able to run it in just under 4 hours, even more intimidating.  I'm slow, folks.  But I think I can get faster for this one.

It's the Diva's Half-Marathon, and there's going to be one in Vail, CO next September.  It's my race.  Listen to the little write-up:

"Runners get the royal treatment-just after mile 12, they recieve a feather boa and tiara; at the finish line, "hunky" firemen hand them a glass of bubbly and a rose."

AND

"It is not just about the run but the whole weekend experience. All our events will host a 2 day Health & Fitness Boutique, a Girls' 5K (open to all ages and genders), a Diva Lounge and more. Some of our races will also host yoga sessions by the beach, Diva Pub Crawls after the race, spa specials, winery visits and more. Each city gives the race its own special flavor for a wonderful weekend with the girls or with family where mom, sister or daughter are stars."

I looked at the website and one can even personalize the running bib!

I think I'd better start working NOW. 

But doesn't that sound like a good first race?

Next topic of discussion:

And this is completely silly, but I've been thinking of it for the last couple of days...

Excluding major appliances (even the Kitchenaid mixer), what 5 tools could you not live without in your kitchen?

It's harder than you think, narrowing it down to 5!

I came up with:

1. My little plastic scraper thingee from Pampered Chef...it scrapes flour off the counter, impossibly stuck food off pans...everything.
2. Wooden spatulas made by one of our hunters.  They are invaluable AND beautiful, made of different woods.
3. That in-between sized knife that is bigger than a paring knife but smaller than a big carving knife. 
4. A really old grater that grates really finely...perfect for lemon zest or cheese or carrots.
5. I don't know if this is a tool, but I have this big kettle that I use for everything...pasta, meats, soups, candy.  There's nothing it doesn't work for.  AND it has a clear glass lid, so I can see what's going on all the time without removing it!

What's on your list?

One more thing: fantasy football. 

I have a draft tomorrow and I have no idea what to do.  One of my high school classmates put together a league, just for fun and so that we could all reconnect, and I let myself be talked into joining.  It's not like I don't get deeply engrossed in the season, anyway...become fiercely competetive over events I have no control over.....re-play games in my head as I drive....wear the same "lucky" shirt every Sunday for 20 weeks.  Now I have a new reason to watch! And my team's name is Hail Mary, which is appropriate on so many levels...

But I'm absolutely lost as to how to do this draft thing.

Any help at all would be greatly appreciated.

I have my list of players, and perhaps I'm a little too ambitious for the first time out.  See what you think of my first round picks, made a week ago and now may have to be revised:

QB- Michael Vick (He's everyone's 1st round draft pick, I'm guessing; so predictable.)

WR- Terrell Owens (I wanted Crabtree, but his health is iffy...darn it!)

RB- Frank Gore (And I KNOW he's a 49er and they're miserable this year...again....still...but I like the guy.)

TE- Vernon Davis (Although, maybe I should look at Marcedes Lewis....input?)

I don't even know how many rounds I need to prepare for!

Blessedly, I'll end the melange there.

Happy Saturday!

Through the Window Friday

Or, in this case, from the porch step through the garden shed door....

Here's a photo story taken yesterday when I got a holler that "Lily's in the garden shed!"

No.

No way.

Um...yes way.

She found where the calf crumbles are stored and when Wayland left the door open to get something else for the shed, she just helped herself.

This is her SECOND break-in of the day, so I grabbed the camera and documented the caper.

Busted!

The best part of the pictures is Willie, standing as the look-out....

And technically, she isn't really IN the shed, if she's just on her knees "looking", right?

"I told her not to do it, Mom!! She's in big trouble, right?"

Not that she cares...

You'll notice the "Good Calf" is gone, now that the law showed up...

Out, out, out,  Naughty Calf!

She's trying to sweet talk him into leaving the door open and turning a blind eye.  And who could resist a sweet, naughty calf face like that?

It didn't work.  And now, as you can plainly see, she's calling him all sorts of names as he walks away.  I won't repeat them here, because this is a family blog.  (You'll note Good Calf on the other side of the fence, saying "I TOLD you so....")  He was called a couple names, too.

The Innocents Abroad

I know...
It's feast or famine with the Chronicles, as of late.
Well, feast with me, now, then!

My bookclub is reading The Innocents Abroad by Mark Twain this summer.  Who would CHOOSE such a book? 

That would be me.

And I love it!

I'm sure everyone else is either making elaborate excuses this week as to why they haven't read it in three months, or vainly struggling to find one section that they can underline and comment on, without actually having to finish the book.  It's not an easy read, but I found it fascinating to see Europe and the Holy Lands through the eyes and wit of Mr. Twain.  I wanted to share an excerpt with you about France...

Ah, the grisettes! I had almost forgotten.  They are another romantic fraud.  They were (if you let the books of travel tell it,) always so beautiful- so neat and trim, so graceful- so naive and trusting- so gentle, so winning- so faithful to their shop duties, so irresistible to buyers in their prattling importunity- so devoted to their poverty-stricken students of the Latin Quarter- so light hearted and happy on their Sunday picnics in the suburbs- and oh, so charmingly, so delightfully immoral!

Stuff!  For three or four days I was constantly saying:
"Quick, Ferguson! Is that a grisette?"
And he always said, "No".

He comprehended, at last, that I wanted to see a grisette.  Then he showed me dozens of them.  They were like nearly all the Frenchwomen I ever saw- homely.  They had large hands, large feet, large mouths; they had pug noses as a general thing and mustaches that not even good breeding could overlook; they combed their hair straight back without parting; they were ill-shaped, they were not winning, they were not graceful; I knew by their looks that they ate garlic and onions; and lastly and finally, to my thinking it would be base flattery to call them immoral.

...I will conclude this chapter with a remark that I am sincerely proud to be able to make- and glad, as well, that my comrades codially endorse it, to wit: by far the handsomest women we have seen in France were born and reared in America.

I read that twice, laughing at his disappointed description...what a let-down for the poor fellow!

Word-y Wednesday

Other blogs have Wordless Wednesday.
Mine tend to be Word-y.

BUT....I'm trying very hard to become a self-contained, quietly restrained, organized, rule-follower this year. 

QUIT LAUGHING!
Everybody has a dream...

These pictures are from our family vacation taken a week and a half ago, and I'm NOT going to caption them.  I'm going to let them speak for themselves. Step One in Reformation 2011....

Coffee Day

I have a friend who only drinks coffee on Wednesdays and on weekends.

Let me repeat that: ONLY on Wednesdays and on weekends.

I'll pause for a moment and let you think about the sort of twisted person that might have that type of caffiene boundary issue...

I recently learned that this friend (and I'm praying for the poor soul) drinks HALF-CAF on those days!

So, it's not REAL COFFEE, even!

It's what I call, Why Bother?

Indeed.

If you are asking how we are still able to be friends, knowing my complete passion for the stuff, you need to know that I feel it's my job to reform and I take this job very seriously.  To the point, even, of buying my friend one of MY favorite coffee drinks...a short, triple shot breve...in hopes that true coffee love would develop. 

I think high blood pressure and cold sweats for 48 hours were the only things that developed.

Darn!

I forgot that triple shots were only for serious java junkies.

Anyway, when I look at the calendar, I always say Happy Coffee Day! on Wednesdays.

Really, some weeks that's all Wednesday has going for it...

Recently, I found a quote for Coffee Day that might need framed in my kitchen.

It will be lost on my friend, but I have others who will embrace it and clap in delight!

"A cup of coffee - real coffee - home brewed, home ground, homemade, that comes to you dark as a hazel eye, but changes to a golden bronze as you temper it with cream that never cheated, but was real cream from its birth, thick tenderly yellow, perfectly sweet, neither lumpy nor frothy on the Java: Such a cup of coffee is a match for twenty blue devils and will exorcise them all."

-Henry Ward Beecher

Happy Coffee Day!

First Day of School, Part II

Okay...you've seen the sweet pictures of the shiny clean students with brand-spankin' new backpacks and lunchboxes, smiling bus driver, cute little teacher and all that.  And everyone says, "Awwww...I LOVE the first day of school!" 

Thank GOODNESS no one is taking pictures of the mothers, that's all I have to say.

Have you ever noticed that?

The unsung heros, who managed to pull it all together to get everyone on the bus, clean and complete....
they look like they've been through war. 

I'm not kidding.

Oh, I know there are a few who actually teach school or have other jobs, and they are neat and pretty on the first day, bless their organized little hearts! 
I'm talking about the stay at home moms who have had, shall we say, VERY flexible schedules for a couple months. 

Frazzled hair, pulled into a quick ponytail to keep it out of her face while she frantically searches the fridge for something to put in the new lunch box. (Because although she may have remembered to get a new lunch box for the child, she neglected to adequately plan for the filling of said lunch box.)

Oversized ratty college tshirt and gym shorts from the run that she thought she had time for. There's a coffee dribble on the tshirt, because an excited child tugged on her arm JUST as she was raising her shaking hand for a first sip, half an hour late.  She's just happy to FIND her coffee, amidst the flurry.

There's pressure to send the child(ren) off with a good breakfast.  All summer, it's been sort of a scavenge situation...survival of the fittest to get cereal, toast or leftover pizza.  Now, all of a sudden, the kids are going to need real nutrition to fuel their growing bodies and minds.  (Also so that they don't get to school and tell the teacher they only chewed on their fingernails that morning...sad violins playing in the background...)  So now she's making eggs (they're fast) AND lunch.  Good grief! Two meals at once!  With no coffee in her system! 

AND....the kids need to be dressed, hair combed, and faces clean.  Again, all optional during the summer, but now rather important.  Hoping, praying that the jeans bought a week ago still fit them...growing like bad weeds....and that the fashion for second grade girls this year is mismatched socks.  (They WERE all laid out and neat, except the brother needed a sleeping bag for his StarWarsGuys...yes, all one word.)

Throw kids in the car, fly to the bus stop in a cloud of dust, not really knowing when the bus is actually going to be there....and looking in the rear view mirror, she sees crumbs on her chin.  Considering the mom hasn't actually eaten that morning, this is a disturbing revelation...

When she sees the other mothers drive up, she sinks a bit in the seat, looking around for sunglasses and wiping the crumbs off surrepticiously on her big tshirt, praying no one had time to put in their contacts.  "I don't know when the bus will be here, honey! Soon!" 

And when the bus pulls up, grabbing the camera to record the magical moment...

So when you look at those dear little pictures of the first day of school, and start getting all nostalgic about the scent of new crayons and chalkboard dust, remember that there's a mother behind them with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder who's sitting in a chair in her tossed kitchen, drinking cold coffee and vowing that NEXT year...NEXT year will be the year they sit down together at the breakfast table all civilized for bran muffins and fruit, calmly discussing the lunch that was packed the night before and the new folders stashed in back packs by color.

And so the year begins...

*No, there will be no photos to enhance this post.  Ever. 

First Day of School 2011

We have a BRAND NEW BUS!!!

And shiny, clean kids ready to board it. 

We have a brand new teacher!

(I don't know if Maggie pushed all the other kids to the side to get off the bus first, but I'm guessing it might've happened.)

Big hugs for Mrs. Carroll...

"Don't worry, we're all a little scared on the first day.  But it'll be okay!"

That's what I heard her tell Mrs. Carroll....

Here! For you! No, really...

That's right.  She found a toad on the front step and showed her new teacher.  Do they just follow the child around, now? I don't want to think about it.  Fortunately (or unfortunately...we'll never know what the intended reaction was to be) Mrs. Carroll handled herself admirably, not screaming or freaking out at the gift.

Ready to learn!

That's the whole school.

When people ask Maggie if she has classmates, she lists the entire school; 6 kids, 4 grades.

Aren't they a cute bunch?!

Through the Window, LATE...

My Through The Window challenge picture was actually taken on Saturday!

You can't really tell, but the little stuffed animal on the boy's lap is also a horse...

I just liked the light and the look on his face....